Steve/Nat

[unshielding]

[ It's not always easy in close quarters with everyone. Steve gets irritable and can't get space to himself. Sam and Wanda just try to steer clear of him when he's like that, but Natasha's never been one to back down, even when Steve growls. He appreciates that about her, because he'd hate to think she only did things to please him. She's about the least pleasing person he knows and that's what makes her the most trustworthy.

She's also the most annoying right now. He's in a sour mood and avoiding all of them. His success rate with this tactic is 0%, but he's still trying it, especially when Natasha's starting to smell ever-so-slightly like she'll go into heat soon, which really doesn't help his head to stay clear. ]

Comments

[unshielding]

I care about you. A lot.

[ Talking about feelings: not actually one of his many skills. ]

I... you're already my partner in all the ways that matter.

[fsb]

[ they're both abominable at this. but it's the word partner that stings in such a sweet way through her chest, like she's been pierced.

it's true: ]

You're mine, too.

[ she lies so well, like her very own language. she can't lie about this. ]

[unshielding]

[ He knows she feels that way, but it's still nice to hear. Doubting her hasn't been on the table for a long time. ]

If you want me to drop it, I will. I don't want you to think I'd ever--

[ How does he even finish that thought? He wants to be there for her and he doesn't know how. ]

[fsb]

[ she takes a step closer to him, removing the gap he had so carefully placed between them. testing him. ]

You said you'd drop it. But it turns out the reason for all your anger and anxiety is me. Just being around me.

[ one hand reaches for his; the other drifts up, splays over his chest. she's trembling. it's a test for him, but it's nearly breaking her as well. ]

How do we go on like this, if just being together has you slamming doors and me crawling out of my skin?

[unshielding]

I don't know.

[ It's hard, having her so close. It takes all of his resolve to stay still, especially when he can feel her shaking and he'd give anything to take that away. He can't go back on his word, though, and he can't use his intimidation. Not on her.

Never on her. ]

You're the smart one. You tell me what you need and I'll give it to you.

[ Even if it's for him to leave her alone. ]

[fsb]

[ she doesn't answer.

what does she need? her body has all kinds of ideas. her mind has others. her heart has different desires entirely.

it's a flurry of indecision and a searing ache of loneliness and longing all mixed up together this close to him. he smells so good — tantalizing and comforting at the same time. thinking is too difficult like this, but she can't bring herself to take a step back again.

instead, she leans her head softly against his chest, and brings his hand up to her face. she nuzzles slowly at his palm, letting his scent wash over her... her eyes roll back in her head and they close; she sees a million brilliant warm colors behind her eyelids. her head dips minutely so that her lips can graze in self-indulgent strokes over his wrist.

body. heart. taking over the mind. ]

[unshielding]

[ Oh.

Steve's breath hitches, but he does his best to let her lead here.

His other arm comes up to wrap around her, but it's a loose barely-hold that she could break with no effort if she wanted to. He only wants to comfort her, to make sure she feels that affection that's always bubbling under the surface, not to trap her in.

This isn't about him.

It can't be when it's her body that's going through heat. He can smell it now and he wants to bury his face in her neck until it's all he's breathing, but he needs her to invite him in. ]

[fsb]

[ her mind says: there are boundaries. her mind says: there are things you can never give him.

her body says: how can things get any worse?

already swimming in the scent of him like home in winter, before she had to struggle to survive in any condition, she moves her lips from his wrist to his throat, barely any pressure. a butterfly's touch, wet but slow, as she stands on her toes.

she considers the arm braced around her; it feels nervous. unsure. like the last corners of her that fight this.

natasha can't be of two minds. she has to choose a path and attack it.

she tilts her head. slides her fingers into his hair. bares her neck to him. ]

[unshielding]

[ He whines, low and desperate, at the feeling of her lips on his skin, the offer of it all.

After that he ducks his head, nose brushing her throat. Careful, not because she's delicate (he knows better than that) but because she's worth the care. Because he knows better than to think that strong people don't deserve a little gentleness sometimes, too.

She might think she's broken, but he doesn't know a stronger person in the world. Even if sex really is off the table, that won't change how he sees her or how he feels. ]